I'm up then I'm down....

'Cause you're hot then you're cold
You're yes then you're no
You're in then you're out
You're up then you're down
You're wrong when it's right


Sounds more like my faith then words to a popular song. Today I'm okay. I'm not okay. I'm between the schoolroom and the laundry room. I had a flat tire and right now my faith feels "flat". I am struggling with relationships and health issues. I was sick all weekend. Actually sicker than I have felt in a very long time. I always feel the longing to just have a day to do nothing and stay in bed and then it comes by way of sickness and I think what did I wish for????

Between the snow we had and the snow we are getting I had to cancel 3 speaking engagements for Wednesday. I was looking forward to them and now instead I have a Dr.'s appt. to go to tonight. Great replacement, hugh???

I feel like a wave tossed in the sea. Thankfully I don't have to stay that way. He is faithful and His word is truth:

He lifted me out of the pit of despair, out of the mud and the mire. He set my feet on solid ground and steadied me as I walked along. ~Psalm 40:2 NLT

I am going to have to depend on that truth today and not on the way I feel. My feelings will deceive me, His word will NOT!

Steady me oh Lord! Get me back on solid ground and thank you that you will be faithful to me even when I am faithless.

How about you? How are you doing today? I would love to hear from you:)

Have blessed day!

Grab a Tissue....

Found this on a friend's blog this morning. It's a bit long but well worth watching. I live a lot of perfectly ordinary days. I am priveleged to have had my family in stages so I have learned much about letting go and cherishing the ordinary. Two of mine are gone, one has a foot out the door, one is turning into a beautiful women in front of me, and three are still here filling my days with messes, giggles, and mundane but perfectly ordinary days. How I wish I could go back. But we can't so we just move forward today. If you are a young mama hang on to those long, hard days because they will be gone in a blink and there you stand holding just the memories because that's all we got left. Have a blessed day!

Insecurity

I see her often. We keep crossing paths. I am not exactly sure why but maybe I should be asking God why so I am not missing something He is trying to do. Anyway, she is stunningly beautiful for her age. Her outward beauty is undeniable and inwardly she seems very sweet and very sincere. I mean she is just darling.

When we first met I felt a twinge of jealousy. She looked great. She seems wealthy(although I don't know this for a fact some of her recent purchases she told me about today would indicate it). Kids are all grown. Empty nest. Travels. Are you starting to see where the twinge of jealousy is coming from????

That was until today. Today I really listened intently to what she said. Today I saw something within her that seemed a bit empty. Maybe lonely. I started thinking about the things she has and thought would I really ever trade the peace I have within me for that?

Nah....That's the only answer I can come up with. I saw some insecurity in her. I started wondering if she has something deep within her that she is trying to feed. I know all about this. I wrestle with my own demons when it comes to insecurity (who am kidding - that is putting it mildly) but I am coming out on the other side of the battle and I would NEVER want to go back. Not for any amount of wealth or eternal youth or anything else for that matter. It is too exhausting. I teared up the other day just thinking back on some of the stupid things I have done that were totally driven by fear and insecurity. Really stupid, life altering things. I can hear God whisper "we've come too far baby to ever go back"!

You know we can buy all kinds of things and do all kinds of things to try and feel secure but in the end we will get old and it will all be for nothing right? I mean no amount of hair dye or expensive haircuts in Philly or great $200 jeans will ever really keep us will they. I don't want to grow old fighting that battle. I am too weary from all the battling I have already done.

She is a beautiful woman. I prayed for her today. I started reading "So Long Insecurity" by Beth Moore yesterday. I pray that woman I keep crossing paths with finds real security and can have her own farewell party for the things that she is grasping at. Things that don't ever really fulfill that empty space. I will keep praying but in the mean time I will continue on in my own journey to a place of secure, peaceful living. Gray hairs, lines, and wrinkles and all.

Have a blessed day!

January 31

Can you believe we are at the end of January???? This has been a crazy busy month and I am just coming off an especially crazy week. I think of you often and you are not far from my thoughts as I am running around trying to maintain some kind of order in my life. Even if I don't get a chance to post I am thinking of you and hoping I am not disappointing you or letting anyone down.

Not only was I blessed to have the opportunity to speak last Sunday but I also spoke on Wednesday in Marysville to a wonderful group of women. Thank you ladies. With that and Bible study that started up again, basketball practices and games, softball practice, appointments for my grandma, school, co-op, drums, etc....My feet hit the ground running every morning. I'm not complaining. I do love the craziness of it all. I am praying though. I read a devotional on being too busy. I felt a twinge of conviction and may have to have a meeting with the Big Guy(God) sometime soon to make sure I am doing what He desires for me.

But until I feel Him telling me otherwise...here I am. I actually am sitting at a Starbucks. My wonderful hubby let me have the evening to work on a training I am helping put together with the Eastern District Women's Ministry team. So I really must get to work on that because I have a deadline staring me in the face right now but I just wanted to take a few minutes to let you know I am thinking of you all.

It has been a tough topic we have been on this month and whew! I am glad it is coming to an end although I hope you are able to take what you learned and apply it for a lifetime. I thought I would just quickly sum up some things we have talked about so far and maybe add a few new things for you to process this week. So here goes:

1. Move more.

2. Eat less.

3. Drink more water.

4. Set realistic goals and be sure your motives are right. Evaluate, evaluate, evaluate. It is an ongoing process that doesn't stop tonight. Did you figure out what your triggers are? If not keep looking and praying to get to the root of your bad habits.

5. Always eat breakfast. I don't think I touched on this before but it is a proven fact that thin people and people who maintain weight loss often eat a healthy breakfast.

6. Eat foods in the most natural state possible. The less processed the better. I am not saying you need to go on a raw diet but when we eat food the way that God created it we will see many health benefits.

7. Keep a food journal if you need to. If you can't lose any weight and you can't seem to figure out why start writing everything down. I am often blown away when it stares me right in the face and usually all the excuses I had go right in the toilet when I see how much I have been eating.

8. Reward yourself.....Not with food though and remember to weigh yourself regularly. Once you reach your goals it is much easier to catch a 5 pound weight gain than a 20.

9. Remember that we battle things on 3 fronts. Our flesh, the world, and the Evil one. This just like anything else is a battle and it can be won. You need to wield the sword of the Spirit which is the Word of God. Keep memorizing His word. That will be key to any victory over any stronghold not just your weight.

10. Once you have lost your weight get rid of your dang "big" clothes. Don't give yourself the opportunity to wear them again. My wardrobe is very limited in size. I used to keep everything and then I would yo-yo. Now when things get tight I need to do something about it because I don't have my fat clothes to fall back on.

I hope I was able to help and encourage you all in some way. I know it is not easy and I don't want to minimize how great a struggle it can be in our life but I know that through the power of Jesus Christ we can experience victory in any area of our life.

I love you all. Keep journaling and keep memorizing scripture. I hope you have a blessed night.

Watch This!

I promise you I will get back to my regularly scheduled weight loss posts this evening but my hubby sent me this link and I watched it and I was very sad. This poor woman DOES NOT fully understand the ramifications that come along with the "choice" to abort an unborn child. I do. I wish I didn't. But I do and I believe that God wants me to be a voice for the unborn child and for the woman caught in an unexpected pregnancy. There was a time in my life that I would have been outraged at this woman and her uneducated opinion. Not anymore. I see her as a person who was fearfully and wonderfully made by God and is lost in total darkness. Today I will pray for her. Please watch this and pray and support CBS in their obvious choice to air this commercial.

January 26

Started a new Bible study this morning. There isn't anything like getting together with those ladies and studying God's word. We are doing the revised edition of Beth Moore's Breaking Free. I have done this study once and I have led it once but it has been revised and God has already been talking to me about some things that I need to be "breaking free" from. If we are going to continue in the process of growing deeper with God it will always be a continual process of letting other things go.

Our weight is no different. If we are going to make this a permanent lifestyle change and not just a passing diet then some things will need to go. We have talked about a lot of them so far. We need to get into our minds that we are not on a diet but on a journey to be healthy.

New verse for you to memorize. It is the first we are memorizing this week in Bible study:

It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery. ~ Galatians 5:1

Once you get through all the steps to a new healthier you be determined to not become a slave again to your old ways. We don't need to be in bondage to our weight or to food or to anything else. It is for freedom that Christ set us free!

In your journal think about what freedom means. What would freedom in the area of weight loss look like to you. What about freedom from the bondage of food? What if we just saw it as a means to be healthy and didn't constantly need to fixate on it. Turn your thoughts into a prayer to God asking Him to set your free once and for all when it comes to dieting and weight.

Have a blessed night!

January 24

Thanks to all of you who prayed for me today. The service I spoke at went well and they gave a generous offering to SVPS. I pray that God was glorified through today's service and that He would continue to bless SVPS.

On another totally unrelated note......I eat a lot when I am bored. Do you??? When you were keeping your food journal did you notice that you ate when you were bored???? One way to combat this is to do something that makes it difficult to eat while you are doing it i.e. paint your nails, read, etc...

It is very hard to eat chips and read a good book. You don't want to get the pages all greasy and you definitely can't eat with wet nails:) The point is you need to direct your attention to something other than food.

If you think you want to eat something ask yourself the following questions:

Am I thirsty??? Drink a glass of water and then reevaluate your hunger.

When did I eat last?

Am I bored or stressed?

If you ask yourself those questions and realize you really shouldn't be hungry then find an activity. And make it one that you can't eat easily. Not TV watching:)

In your journal ask God to fill you with His spirit. Ask Him to continue to reveal to you the reasons for your eating habits.

Have a blessed night!

January 23

Did I say I would post everyday in January???? I don't know if I said it but it was my goal. I am falling a bit short though. I realized I didn't post yesterday and I know I took a few days off last week. Part of me feels like a failure and thinks maybe I should give up on the goal but the other part of me knows the importance of determination.

I guess that would be a good tip for today. If you have a bad day or few days it doesn't mean your a failure and you should give up totally on your weight loss goals. Just get back up. Don't give up. We are so quick after we eat that piece of cake to say I messed up I might as well eat the whole cake. It is a bad mentality to have. One bad choice doesn't make a failure out of you.

You will have a bad day or days depending on the time of the month. That's ok just try to learn from it but keep going. You don't have to throw in the towel. You can make better choices tomorrow. You are not doomed. Satan would love to have you believe all these lies but remember we are combating lies with the truth of God's word.

Today in your journal talk to God about your feelings of failure in the past. Ask Him to help you to see yourself as He sees you through eyes of grace.

Please pray for me. Tomorrow in Sanctity of Human Life Sunday. I am speaking at a church on behalf of our local pregnancy center. If ever there was a topic that I was passionate about and that I want to do well with it is this. It is my heart to convey the importance of supporting our local pregnancy center so that more woman in our area choose life.

Have a blessed night!

January 21

Did you get a chance to read Lysa's blog post from yesterday???? And did you discover any lies you have been believing??? If you haven't had a chance to do so go back to yesterday and do this. This part will be vital in weight loss success and keeping the weight off.

We can be so bound up in lies of the enemy that we may live our whole life and miss out on the abundant life God has for us. What lies are you believing?????

Today I also want you to think about simple substitutions. I substituted all sorts of things when I started losing weight. I swapped a "100 calorie" pack of cookies for the Oreos I love. I swapped Skinny Cow ice cream for Ben and Jerry's. I went to baked pita chips instead of regular chips.

Now more than ever there are plenty of things you can find to substitute for things you like. The key to making this work though is once again...moderation. You can only eat one pack of the cookies not 5. You can have one serving of the ice cream not 3 and for pity sakes don't sit down and eat the whole bag of pita chips.

This doesn't mean that I don't ever eat real Oreos. It just means for the most part I can find things to swap and save a bunch of calories and still enjoy what I am eating.

In your journal ask God to help you to crave healthy things. Give your cravings over to Him. Ask Him once again to help you to learn self-control. We have the Holy Spirit ladies. We are not alone in this.

Have a blessed night!

January 20

I read this great post on Lysa TerKeurst's blog today. Well worth the read. So my asignement today for you.....Read it.

After you read it grab your journal and start writing down the lies you have been believing. Once you have a list written pray over it. Pray for God's truth and power to invade your heart. Ask Him to show you the areas you have been believing lies and don't even realize it yet. If He reveals anything to you add it to your list. Then write down all the truths to combat those lies!

Keep memorizing scripture and have a blessed night!