Let me start this post by saying I am normally a law abiding citizen. So much so that sometimes my kids (especially Chris) make fun of me. Can you believe that yesterday I got pulled over again???? This time I was going 82 in a 65. This time I held back the tears although they did well up and the officer assured me it was ok. This time I got a ticket and 4 wonderful points on my record. The second time in a month. I haven't been pulled over in over 15 years and now twice in one month. I think (actually I know) there is a lesson God is trying to get me to learn through this. Both times I was upset about something with my kids and both times I was on the phone(a big no no) and didn't even realize how fast I was going. Sometimes the emotions of everything just overtake us and God needs to get our attention somehow. I am just glad He has used me getting pulled over and not me getting into an accident. I have learned to be fairly controlled in my emotions except when it comes to my kids. I am definetely a mother bear and you had better not mess with my cubs. Lately Satan has been messing with them. I am angry(thus the fast driving). I know God wants me to learn to trust and to be self-controlled when it comes to them. My kids have always been such a touchy subject for me. I have always been willing to give Him everything except hand them over. I want to be in control when it comes to them. I was reading a blog the other day and read a word that was there just for me. It was my rhema. Did you know "word" is translated two ways in the Bible? Logos which is God's word - the whole Bible and Rhema which is a personal word He speaks to us through the Bible. You know when a passage just leaps off the page to you. When it comes at just the right time and you can almost hear an audible voice speaking right into your heart and soul. That is Rhema. I got mine the other day with this passage:
“For I will pour water on the thirsty land,
and streams on the dry ground;
I will pour out my Spirit on your offspring,
and my blessing on your descendants.
They will spring up like grass in a meadow,
like poplar trees by flowing streams.
One will say, ‘I belong to the Lord’;
another will call himself by the name of Jacob;
still another will write on his hand,
‘The Lord’s,’ and will take the name Israel.”
I just need to sit and wait for Him to pour out His spirit on my offspring. I have to give it over once and for all. No more driving fast and feeling like I can't function because of circumstance. This is a battle I have been fighting for a long time. Please pray for me. I need some real wisdom right now on how to proceed with a certain situation and I need to be self-controlled no matter what. I can't afford to lose my license or to pay any more fines:) Hope you have a blessed weekend!
The Big Boo Cast, Episode 75
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