Tuesday, September 6, 2011

Time Keeps Ticking Away....

Doctor: You don't have skin cancer. Mrs. Grove you just have age spots and sun spots caused by age and too many years in the sun.

Me: What? Me? Didn't I just graduate from high school and get married??? Didn't I just stand here in this very same office surrounded by little ones? I am not old enough for "age" spots.

And this is the conversation that I had with the doctor.

When did I start aging? When did that baby boy of mine grow up graduate, and start working towards a career as a chef? Don't I still sit at every one of his hockey games with baited breath as he nears the goal and don't I still stand up ready to run out onto the rink when he gets hit by a puck and goes down?

And what about my other "little" ones?

Wait, I don't have little ones anymore. Everyone is fully potty trained, fully capable of dressing, feeding, and bathing themselves.

And so it goes. Time keeps marching on. I can't stop it. I can't go back. And obviously by the gray hair in my head and the lovely "age" spots on my face I can't even hide it very well.

I know just like anything else I have a choice.

I can embrace it or I can fight it. I can live with purpose today or just think about starting tomorrow. Either way the clock ticks.

No matter what I do time isn't going to stop and wait for me to choose. I guess that's where I am today. On the eve of my 20th....yes you read that right...20th wedding anniversary I am contemplating life. My purpose. I am evaluating how I have been doing lately and I am planning for a better tomorrow.

Won't you join me. Let's be women who live each minute with purpose.

Intentional living.

You see it is so easy to get caught in the trap of waiting until tomorrow. But when we do that we waste today. And not only that my today will profoundly effect my tomorrow. Even if I do nothing it effects tomorrow because tomorrow will just turn into another today lived out without purpose.

I have lived the last year like this. Sorta in denial. Sorta just wondering through life. Satan loved it, God grieved over it, and I am sick to death of it. I am setting some goals, getting some accountability, taking some risks, and learning to live again.

If you are struggling right now don't be afraid because desperation has been the sweetest gift for me. Let me know where you are and if you need prayer. It would be an honor to hear from you and do this journey together.

Have a blessed day!

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

"Don't stop this train. Don't for a minute change the place you're in..." I cry EVERY time I hear this song because I want to stop the train. Why does it move so fast and leave so many people behind?

I'll be praying for you. Praying that you set your goals and reach them. Praying that this school year goes well for both you and your students. Praying that the next 20 years will be bring an abundance of blessings for you and your husband.

I've grown a lot over the last couple years and most of it is due to be thrown down and trampled by life. I love how you said that desperation has been such a sweet gift. Well said. I thought that I had surrendered my life to Him until I really did. There is a new peace in my circumstances now, no matter what they are.

"Live Intentionally."
(I think we need a t-shirt with this saying on it.)